“Try as we might by our appearance, performance, or social status to find self-verification for a sense of being somebody, we always come short of satisfaction. Whatever pinnacle of self identity we achieve soon crumbles under the pressure of hostile or criticism, introspection or guilt, fear or anxiety. We cannot do anything to qualify for the by-product of being loved unconditionally and voluntarily” -Neil T. Anderson
Why am I on this journey? What really prompted me to halt my current reality and disappear to the third world for a year to serve people?
The answer is simple, yet complicated to many: I believe with my entire heart that this is where God has called me.
Yet this news is typically met with a basic worldly reaction.
“You are 21 years old Mason, this is such a great opportunity for you to see the world!”
Yes, I am 21 years old. Yes, this is a “wonderful life opportunity”. Yes, 11 countries in 11 months qualifies for seeing the world. However, This journey has a much bigger purpose for me. I am diving deeper into my relationship with the Lord, and learning to grow into the person he created me to be.
I explained this to a coworker and her reaction was quite humorous to me. “But you already have it all together, you seem to really know who you are”. I sure had her fooled. It seems like the people who “have it all together” are the ones who are truly lost. So often what we are on the outside is a facade created to protect the negative self image we project internally. I was so insecure about letting anyone in that I had completely lost sight of who I was.
That is why God brought me on The World Race. He sees me as His son, created in his perfect image. I was searching for personal fulfillment in appearance, achievement, and social status. Nothing I could do on this earth could measure up to the abundant feeling of God’s love. Right before I left a friend told me that I was chasing something I could never find. That I was like an addict chasing an unquenchable high. In his book “Mere Christianity”, C.S Lewis summarized my perspective perfectly. “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy. The most probable explanation is that we were made for another world”. My focus is eternal, and every day I spend growing in His love uncovers more of who he has made me to be.
So what does this look like for me?
My outlook on life is love-based. He is giving me opportunities to set aside my selfish desires to love others with a servants heart. He is teaching me how to love my ministry, my squad, and my team like He does. He is re-defining the way I view myself. He has relieved me of my personal therapist title. I am trusting in Him to led me through my peaks and valleys. I am more comfortable with my child-like personality. I don’t feel pressure to meet any external expectations. Most importantly, He has helped me let go of my past. He has renamed me The Forgiven One. Jesus Christ has set me free of my bondage to live a truly abundant life. These 11 months will be life changing.
Thank you to everyone who continues to support me. You are so loved and appreciated.
